Hot Thoughts are the ideas we think to ourselves that instantly get us angry.   They literally make us hot because they can cause our blood to start circulating faster and faster.

• Trigger Thoughts.   That’s because these thoughts are triggers for the gun called anger.   Think them and boom, off goes the gun.
• Automatic Thoughts,  because they occur so quickly in our minds.

Something bad happens or we think about what could go wrong, and there they are, making us angry.   Hot Thoughts, Trigger Thoughts, Automatic Thoughts.   Whatever we call them, they cause trouble.   These thoughts are the junkyard dogs of our minds, because they’re always ready for a fight.  That’s why we’ve got to keep them on a strong leash.

Hot Thoughts are usually short, vague, and overgeneralized.   Here are a few examples:

• “I don’t take shit from anybody.”
• “I can’t take it anymore.”
• “They’re out to get me!”
• “I hate you.”
• “How dare they say (or do) that!”

1. First, we must identify what our most common hot thoughts are.   I say that because trigger thoughts are often so automatic for us that we don’t pay attention to what it is exactly that we’re telling ourselves.   We don’t notice what we’re thinking, much less question whether or not what we’re believing is true or accurate.
2. Second, we need to come up with cool thoughts to replace each of our hot thoughts.   What we’re doing here is changing the way we think about things.   This works to keep our angry thoughts in check because if we change the way we think about something, then we will also change how we feel about it.
   
      Hot Thought:   “I don’t take shit from anybody.”
     Cool Thought:  “I’ll listen to somebody I respect.”
3. Third, we must practice, practice, practice each of these cool thoughts so that they become as automatic as our original hot thoughts.   Take the time to memorize them if you have to, or put them up at home somewhere you’ll see them on a regular basis, like on the refrigerator. You may even want to write them out on an index card and carry them around with you for awhile until you’ve learned them.

If we do these three steps, then what will happen eventually is that when we get in a situation and we get angry, our cool thoughts will automatically follow our hot ones.  We’ll be able to calm down much more quickly than we had been able to before.   And we won’t be letting our anger get the best of us.   We’ll be in control.